As much as I want to stay away from thinking and obsessing about health and healthy food, I cannot stop thinking that one piece of the puzzle is missing. Let me explain to you…
My self realisation on being a healthy food addict helped me to unplug from thinking about this area of my life which took over all the others in order to attain equilibrium in my life. Constantly thinking about food and health made me a less sociable person. I simply forgot to enjoy different aspects of my life such as caring for others instead of being self obsessed with own self but also experiencing FUN and non food related pleasures that life has to offer to me!
On Saturday the 7th of April 2012, I realized that my healthy food addiction was as unhealthy as overindulging in plain and non-nutritious food. I had to stop putting my whole energy in thinking about what type of food and what restriction I had to do in order to resolve my cravings, my digestive issues, this losing sense of control when facing a very appealing and charming piece of cake (I N-E-E-D to eat it all…and Q-U-I-C-K, just in case someone else is NOT finishing the whole cake before me….so I can have another serving….and perhaps another one…),my intense blood sugar fluctuations resulting in big slumps of energy mid morning and mid afternoon, my unclear and dull complexion (I am grateful for you OH Make-up bag…), my greying advanced hair, my hyper-pigmentation on my forehead that once exposed to the sun, a United State map is appearing… my mood swings and sometimes unexplained state of worries and anxiety, my irregular periods, my fragile and thinning enamel and so on.
I do believe that by obsessing with my issues, I wasn’t giving my body the opportunity to heal by itself. The body is amazing but I didn’t trust my body. I was creating FEAR by constantly analysing what the impact of each type of food was having on my body. I wasn’t relaxed enough about the whole process.
After this self realisation, I then allowed myself to eat a bit of everything. Working in a bakery, it was total insanity to not indulge in wonderful cupcakes and brownies! So step by step, I allowed myself to indulge in one of them, enjoyed them and let it go. No after thoughts such as: Oh MY GOD…I wonder if this piece of cake is going to have an impact on my blood sugar levels or…ok ok I will eat healthier tonight to compensate…None of that. I was allowing myself to eat whatever I wanted and in moderation. My next job was to imply myself in a non-food related activity so I could forget about thinking about food too much.
However, after a good couple of months of indulging on these wonders…I found it extremely difficult to resist in eating more and more and more. I was “addicted” to them too. My increase of sugar also corresponded to very delayed periods (at this date, it has been 3 months and I still didn’t see a sign of my periods and NO, I am NOT pregnant). My complexion well…a long time I didn’t experience this amount of “friendly” spots on my forehead and chin. One morning, my partner said to me: “oh babe it would be nice if those spots could disappear”… I was aware of this invasion and didn’t want this invasion to put me down. It didn’t matter to me but his distress in his voice let me think that it was…really bad! My concealer has and is my best friend in this moment in time!
So, as much as I want to NOT think about healthy food and obsessing about it…something is not quite right. Something is really not quite right…
I do not know how and why I ended up watching this documentary on YOU TUBE but I do believe that I meant to watch this video to help putting my body back in balance. Because this is it: My body is truly out of balance. Being in balance, my body would show sign of health by having clear and glowing skin, I would have regular periods and wouldn’t experience unexplained state of stress and anxiety.
As much as I don’t want to pay too much attention to heath related articles, I couldn’t stop myself watching the following video: “Sugar: the bitter truth” by Dr Lustig http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM.
Watching this video has been a very powerful trigger in term of understanding my cravings for sweet food (the one that I cannot dream of stopping,the one that I hate because of what it does to me: guilt / lack of sense of control / addiction… the one that I am craving for, the one which is bringing me comfort at times of stress/ frustration or reward after a long and hard day at work, the one that I tried to substitute healthier versions with: honey, agave and yacon syrup, lucuma powder, dried fruits and superfood such as goji berries, acai, mulberries in order to overindulging in it…the one that I am A-D-D-I-C-T-E-D to.
As much as I want to unplug from thinking about health and healthy food, something within me has lightening a red light…I am ready to quit sugar NOW…may be not forever as I am not keen on depriving myself for life and I do believe that living in this world makes it really unfeasible…but I want to experience the JOY of not having cravings for sugary food. I just want to try and test. I am ready. I am now. Since these last few months, I have been more than aware of what sugar did and does to me and I want to give my body the opportunity to heal by detaching myself from this substance for at least a couple of months. Just to try…
I have made a bit of research and here are some facts: We are eating far too much sugar that we are supposedly designed to do. In the last 30 years, sugar has tremendously increased in our diet (process food / energy drinks / savoury snacks…WHY? because the food industry does know that we have got this special attachment to sweet things…it does taste good and it does SELL very well too). We are eating less fat, we are exercising more than ever and we are living in a society where obesity is constantly on increase. https://www.enlita.com/health-articles/diet-nutrition/shocking-truth-about-agave-syrup
As far as concern my cravings for sweet food, I understood that my overconsumption of it (even healthier versions of it) made me strongly attached and addicted to it. Of course, I do believe that other variables have to be taken into account. But by understanding that my overconsumption of sugar (NO 1 damaging sugar: fructose) has been altering my hormone ( leptin) the one capable of telling me when I am full or not… is coming very handy for the next couple of months.
After all my incapacity of stopping to just one small slice of cake is perhaps not simply linked by my lack of will power, as I thought previously? Perhaps, I need to give a bit more attention to the following fact by http://www.livestrong.com/article/319093-fructose-diet/:
Fructose vs. Glucose
Glucose is found in beans and starchy foods such as pasta, bread and rice. Like sucrose, it is also used as an additive to sweeten foods. Glucose is used directly by all organs in the body for energy but fructose must be converted by the liver before use. Whereas a surplus of glucose sugar in the body signals the satiety center in the brain, fructose does not have that feedback mechanism, and a high-fructose meal may leave you feeling hungry. Fructose does not stimulate insulin secretion like other carbohydrates do. Excess ingestion of fructose could increase body weight.
SO, TODAY I want to share with you my journey on quitting sugar along side all the other things that I am trying out to put my whole life back in balance! I am ready to experiment and being very gentle during the whole process. I want to share my challenges that I am facing by quitting sugar but also what actions I am putting into place to ease this transition. Because hell YEAH…I am expecting a bit of roller coaster and perhaps not a very smooth ride. BUT I AM READY NOW 🙂
I do not want to advocate sugar free for life as deprivation is not my cup of tea. And let’s be honest, temptations are everywhere in this very sugary world! But I do want to give my body a break of not eating sugar for the next 8 weeks. I do want to break free of this addiction and I do believe that by not exposing my body to the substance at least for a couple of months, I will be able to put my body back in balance and enjoy occasional sweet treats and not experiencing gluttony 🙂
I know that some of you will think, here we go again…another healthy diet plan…Not exactly…it feels right for me to do so. I am allowing myself to eat everything else apart…sugar. Sugar is empty calorie and not necessarily nutritious…I don’t want to make a big deal of it though. I just want to experiment and see… and narrowing my own personal experience….
Well…wish me GOOD LUCK and I will be reporting my progress on a regular basis.
In the meantime, I wish you a beautiful day,